March 17, 2020

How to use Video Counseling with Kathleen:

What equipment do I need?

To participate in Telehealth appointments from your home, you will need one of the following devices:

  • Desktop computer with a webcam, speakers, a 2.5 GHz processor, and 4 GB of RAM OR

  • Laptop com...

August 13, 2018

Listening without interrupting

Ask questions in order to really understand

Don’t take things personally

Show your partner empathy

Validate your partner (does not mean you agree)

Delay gratification

Understand your partner in light of partner’s history

Remember what you learn...

February 5, 2018

"Life long love is not like a wildflower; it requires cultivation"  William Doherty.

February 24, 2017

If you agree with at least three of these statements,  you may want to come in for a "tune up". If you agree with four or more, you are probably due for a "major service". Keep your coupleship running smoothly.


  • When my partner and I disagree we end...

February 15, 2017

  1. Pay attention - put down your phone, make eye contact

  2. Respond with your face – nod once in a while, smile, look concerned

  3. Put aside judgments

  4. Reflect back what you heard and check to be sure you got it right

  5. Ask clarifying questions

  6. Acknowl...

February 15, 2017

Equipment: two pens, two sheets of paper, a coin to toss

Each member of the couple takes a pen and paper and writes down a list of everything they appreciate about their partner as quicky as possible. Do this privately for about 5 minutes or less.  Don'...

February 15, 2017

Equipment: timer, a coin to toss


Mirroring with a timer is an effective way to practice really listening to your partner. It is especially helpful if you tend to interrupt each other during an argument.  Start by flipping the coin to decide who goes first....

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February 5, 2018

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3468 Mt Diablo Blvd Suite B200
Lafayette, CA 94549